Starting Over
When I first started this blog I was very angry and I was very scared about the type of people that live in our world. I'm a new-ish mom and I want to do everything that I can to protect my children. I thought that if I read the pedo blogs that I could get an insider's view into the world of pedophilia and that I could take steps to keep my boys from coming into contact with them. In my mind, all pedo's were child molesters.
My first encounter was the blog of a man who's AOA (age of attraction) is infants/toddlers. Since my children fall within this age range I was horrified that someone could find them sexually attractive. I became "reactive" and my only defense was to attack. I was threatened by this man because he posted his fantasies on the internet for everyone to read. I was threatened by him because I do not understand him.
I have received many comments from pedophiles who wanted to share their views with me. They wanted to explain why their attraction to children was acceptable. Most of them said that they only had the children's best interest at heart. Every one of them said that they had never had a sexual relation with a child. Some of them went so far as to call me a pedophile because I have children. A few of them accused me of being jealous of younger girls.
Even after reading all of the pedo's comments, I still do not understand how a grown man/woman could find a child to be sexually attractive. I do not understand how they could lust after a child. I would go so far as to say it's my mother's instinct that all children should be nurtured and protected and that having sex with them does not nurture or protect them in anyway. Of course, I had several mothers leave comments trying to appeal to the "mother in me" and show me how pedophilia was acceptable.
What I did gather from continued reading was that there is a difference between a child lover and a child molester. However, seeing as how I am an Anti, I think the distinction is a very thin line and that given the opportunity, a child lover could easily become a child molester. With this in mind, I do not trust my children with anyone. I have learned that anyone could be a pedophile - my next door neighbor, one of the moms in my mom's club, or a teen-aged babysitter.
It seems like the pedophiles are very good at quoting facts and statistics to support their cause. They offer these key pieces of evidence and then demand some from me in rebuttal. I began to obsess about how I could present my side in a factual manner. I thought about the argument so much that I couldn't sleep at night. I've decided that the only thing I can say is that pedophilia is wrong because it's wrong. Just like slavery is wrong or killing people is wrong. It is inherently wrong.
I'm not saying this because I'm jealous of younger girls. I'm a happily married woman who has the constant attention and devotion of my husband. I am not saying this because I want to repress children. I realize that children are curious and that at some point they will want to know about sex. That being said, I do think they should be educated but that does not mean I think they should be allowed to have sex.
I do not condone pedophilia but that does not mean that I hate pedophiles. I do not think that pedophiles should be hunted down and killed. I do think that they need to seek professional help. Many of the pedophiles who commented here said that they were born this way. If that is the case, then I don't know if they can ever be "cured" of pedophilia but with help, maybe they can keep from crossing the line between CL and child molester.
posted by angry momma @ 11:44 PM
8 comments
8 Comments:
Hi I'm glad to see you reopened your blog. You're notorious LOL
While in theory I do understand what they are saying about the difference between the noun pedophile and the verb molester........its just garbage spewing forth from their mouths. While there may be an occasional pedophile who never offends, I'd say the majority of them do at some point in their lives. One child is too many, in my view.
If as they say they are child lovers who don't have sex with children why is their agenda: to bring about tolerance and acceptance of them....next step abolishment of age of consent laws?
I also don't believe in hunting down pedophiles to kill them. My goal is to shut them up. I won't stand by while they lobby for 'little insignificant' laws that can blow up in the face of society on down the road. Laws they support to diminish your rights as a parent.
They hunt in gangs looking for people to pounce upon and harass. I think you needed back up when they went after you.
"What I did gather from continued reading was that there is a difference between a child lover and a child molester."
This is very good you're seeing this! :)
"However, seeing as how I am an Anti, I think the distinction is a very thin line and that given the opportunity, a child lover could easily become a child molester."
Here's where I think you're kinda going off the road a bit. I'll try to explain why (and I've talked a few times about this on my podcast).
People who offend are of one of two major categories:
A) Sadists
B) Pedophiles
The first category falls under what you normally see on the news where some man or woman abducts, rapes and kills someone less powerful than them because they get a sexual kick out of hurting others. This has nothing to do with pedophilia and the two should not be confused. These are the sick people who need help because the behavior is destructive and is usually from an abused past.
The second category is where things get complicated. The reason for this is, just like with any other sexual orientation, there's people with good and bad ethics. The question is not whether or not it happened, but HOW it happened, and that's what you must use to judge as to whether or not the grounds for it being an illegal offense is justified. I'll give you an example situation:
Johnny's 12 years old. He has an older friend of the family named Bill who is 20 and is his best friend and mentor. His older friend happens to be gay. Johnny knows of this and is curious about it. Perhaps he finds other boys his age sexual, but he's noticing that he's finding musclebound studs in the Playgirl Magazine under his mom's bed arousing. (Think of this in the same context as how a straight kid might find the centerfold in Playboy just as arousing.) Johnny approaches Bill (who he always comes to for advice because he's close to him and can ask him anything without fear of rejection) and asks him what it feels like to be gay, or to have sex. They talk about it, and Johnny, following his instincts, hits on Bill. Bill finds Johnny attractive and is tempted to give into the advance and be there for Johnny in a potentially healthy, positive, and loving learning experience.
Now... depending on the society and whether it's open or repressed, a few of things can happen. Is the society accepting of guided sexual experimentation between two people of differing ages? Are Johnny's parents accepting of such a thing? Does Johnny have the educational background to know the repercussions of getting sexual with his older friend? Are the laws geared for strict heterosexual/marriage-only relationships or does the society allow freedom of sexual expression?
In the United States, Bill might more commonly be of the following traits:
A) Self-loathing. Especially if he commonly has these feelings for someone that young, he might already consider himself immoral and a monster for merely having the attractions even though he'd never hurt a fly, simply because it's plastered all over the nightly news, the newspapers, the internet, and blogs like Absolute Zero.
B) Frustrated, confused, guilty.
C) Possibly lacking experience in relationships after having repressed his attractions unlike all of his straight classmates back in Jr High and High School.
Now, because of how this situation had presented itself, let's say the two actually do play around. Johnny, depending on HIS personal perception of himself, might feel wonderful afterward, or might feel guilty and shameful that he likes guys.. not to mention older guys. He might be prone to tell someone what happened either because he was proud of the experience and wants to show off (very common) or he's guilty and needs to tell someone because he's unsure of what he did with another guy was right. So, he tells one of his friends who's parents are strict Catholics. His friend ends up telling his parents who then report the consentual act to the authorities who are given no choice but to prosecute regardless of their personal feelings, Johnny gets put into psychological therapy for his "molestation", and Bill ends up on the SOR for the rest of his life after spending years in prison, becomes a hardened soul through attempting to survive with a harsh correctional environment, is forced to go into "sex rehab", made to wear a monitoring device (because he's /obviously/ a danger to himself and others as a "violent offender"), losses his high paying job and residence, ends up going to alchohol or drugs, and hates himself even more for having done something apparently so evil that he himself hadn't seen the wrong in it, and ends up killing himself one day, or being hunted down by some maverick vigilante who takes the law into his own hands because of the hysteria surrounding this whole thing.
... or how about this as an alternative.
Bill and Johnny end up having sex. Johnny's first experience with someone older than him is warm and loving, and Johnny feels that love and sex are a good thing because of it. Johnny parents, while still being worried and protective, see that Johnny has his own mind and needs and desires, know Bill is a good person and would never hurt Johnny so they allow it to happen. Johnny ends up having his curiousities satisfied for the time being and the two grow even closer friends. Eventually maybe a couple years down the road, Johnny ends up with a full-time boyfriend he meets in art class. He introduces his new boyfriend to Bill who then praises the two and tells them they're a cute couple. Johnny, having already been through a lil in bed because of his mentor, helps his boyfriend become more secure with himself about his sexuality as well. Bill, who loves Johnny, helps finance his young friend through school because perhaps his parents aren't that wealthy, or maybe he's not in a good home environment, and 5 years later, after finishing high school goes to college and moves in with his boyfriend. The three still get together for Super Bowl and cards. Bill ends up meeting someone more his age who perhaps looks a lil younger and it's a perfect match. They get married and support one another until their deaths and Johnny goes to his mentor's funeral someday and tells the audience how wonderful it was to have had him in his life when he needed him.
In rare cases, even with such repressive laws and beliefs in the U.S., this second scenario currently happens, but it's very rare because of the intolerant environment. The two have to be very lucky, very smart, and have to live in constant fear someone will find out. In a world where it was accepted and legal, with protective provisions in the law to prevent abuse no matter the age; young or old, this would be much more prevailent.
"With this in mind, I do not trust my children with anyone. I have learned that anyone could be a pedophile - my next door neighbor, one of the moms in my mom's club, or a teen-aged babysitter."
Hopefully after having read everything I just wrote, could you perhaps see where you might be jumping the gun about this? Why the heck are you fearing us so much?
If someone were to actually take advantage of someone weaker or younger than them who would otherwise be an ethical person, I can tell you that it's most likely a result of self-infliction... Someone who's trained and brainwashed by everyone around them all their life to be told that they're something bad and evil (when they feel that it's so natural) will eventually break down. They might manipulate or coerce some kid because that's the ONLY way they could ever see it happening... no help, no guidance, no support, nowhere to turn but the downward spiral. The more pedophilia is repressed, the larger this problem will become, because there's no way ever ever ever that therapy or suppression will ever work to "get rid" of it. Why? Because it's a natural part of human biology to feel this way about younger people. It's always been there and it's never going to leave. We're human, and just about every human carries at least a small fraction of this sexuality within them. It just so happens that me and a LOT of other people have it, and are geared toward it; to help, to mentor, to love, and to be there for young people. It's who we are. Sexual experiences aren't bad. They're not tainted or evil or sick, or twisted; not unless you MAKE it that way. It's just a part of what makes up humanity. Don't let this culture of fear we live in ruin the enjoyment of being a parent and living your life.
If you've been hurt in the past by someone or something, all I can say is, I'm very sorry that happened. I wouldn't wish that on anyone. But please, don't judge us all by that, and don't hurt your children by making them fear everything and everyone around them. You'll just be continuing the cycle.
No, no abolishment needed. Just a rebranding of those laws. Those laws may be about consent, but not the way people think. Those laws are about the allowance of consent, not the ability. Slight difference... Perhaps it's better to raise it to 30, because most of my agemates are idiots too.
Stitches77 said They hunt in gangs looking for people to pounce upon and harass.
Yes, the antis have a similar habit. rikijo, perverted justice (fitting name, btw) and more of them... They all love to hunt. They even like to nail teens.
angrymomma... good to see you online again. you're one of the few I actually like to read. At least you try to reason, instead of just ranting and raving. Keep up the good work ^^
Blessed be
JB
Well actually Rookie, I'll be quite honest with you. I never had an interest in this topic (except normal protective instincts when my children were young) until one of you decided to bombard my daughter's blog and force her to let you on board to make comments like 'we love children, we'd never harm children'. When she said NO, go away, good old Winston Smith/debatecrime decides to pick a fight. He can't take no for an answer---he goes to call in the troops on a forum open to the public to read and as a result over a 3 day period she received several hundred emails. There were a lot of familiar names and a lot of whining and pleading for acceptance. There were also a couple hundred anonymous, threatening and rage filled emails.
So your little peace, love and brotherhood story simply nauseates me. Debatecrime incited violence and hatred for someone who simply wanted to blog in peace.
You people have known about him for a long time and continue to accept him in your midst. Why would anyone think that a parent giving up his/her rights/obligations to protect her child would end with a loving wonderful experience for him, rather than with a raging deranged selfish hate filled pervert?
You go on and continue to accept that lunatic but this time he messed with the wrong bitch (his word for me). I'm not going away. Your movements enemies have grown and are spreading the word. So tell good ol' Winston that I'm coming for him, and I'm bringing hell with me.
Rookiee, You may present your case in an in depth and intelligent manner. But you are wrong. You are disgusting.
A child is too young to have sex and is too young to make that dicision.
Just because you are "attracted" to children doesn't make them able to emotionally or legally consent to sex. Your wanting it to happen has nothing to do with it.
Your story of 'oh gee isn't it cute that Johnny discovered gay sex at the age of 12 and his parents thought it was great- makes me want to puke.
Children have the right to be children, free of the stress and burdens of adult decisions and actions. Sexual curiosity on the part of a child does NOT make it OK for a pedophile to take advantage of them. And that's what it is- taking advantage of them. A child is too young to have 'consentual' sex.
Hi, AngryMomma.
I haven't read anything on your blog before, though I did hear of you.
I am indeed attracted to children -- but the reason I do not feel guilt for this is, aside from many statistical arguments, the fact that I remember being very lonely as a child. I wished for intimacy in the same way adults do. When I was nine, my mom found a page I'd written about wanting to experience sex and totally embarassed me over it, so I know I'm not just remembering my feelings incorrectly. Because of this, I think it's just as wrong to force a child to be romantically alone as it is to force and adult to be alone.
I respect you for not being full of hatred, so I hope you don't feel like I'm trying to be rude. I just want to explain how I felt as a child, and I'm curious what your comments are on how I felt back then.
MagZ and I would like to personally invite you to join our forum Angry_Mom. We have opened this forum in hopes that Antis and Pedos alike can converse and debate without fear of deletion. That and the comments debate were getting old. lol
So, please do join us. We are fairly new, just opened it today. So any of the pedophiles that read your blog are also welcome to join. Feel free what ever you feel would help everyone understand each other a bit better.
Only a few rules at the forum, and once you are registered you wil be able to see them.
Hope to see you all there, especially you Angry_Mom
http://southernsass.bbfunpro.com/southernsass.html
"Even after reading all of the pedo's comments, I still do not understand how a grown man/woman could find a child to be sexually attractive. I do not understand how they could lust after a child."
I think your difficulty in understanding how a pedo could be sexually attracted to a child is perfectly normal. I doubt you will ever be able to really "understand" it.
Personally, I don't understand how a man could ever find another man to be sexually attractive. I don't think I ever will understand it.
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